Grimm Recap 603 • Oh Captain, My Captain

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Grimm Recap: Oh Captain, My Captain
By Sara Netzley for Entertainment Weekly

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Okay, how cool would it be if in Grimm’s final season, each episode picks up exactly where the last one left off? Kind of like 24, but with less torture, and any moles would be the furry Wesen kind.

I bring this up because the players are exactly where we left them at the end of the premiere, with the SERT team surrounding Bud’s shop and the Grimm team trapped inside. Everyone starts to panic, but nobody more than Monroe, who blurts, “Rosalee’s pregnant!”

In a touching, true-to-character moment, Nick stops dead to sincerely congratulate them and also apologize for placing them in the middle of a manhunt. He immediately decides to surrender in order to protect his friends.

Outside, Hank and Wu roll up to relieve Renard of command and arrest him for the murder of Rachel Wood. Mass confusion ensues when Renard screams at the team to continue the raid and Hank screams for them to stand down.

Once Renard’s stuffed into the back of Wu’s car and they pull away, the SERT leader orders his troops to move in. Um, shouldn’t either Hank or Wu have stuck around to make sure the team followed orders?

Adalind arrives at the spice shop so the parents-to-be can watch her half-Hexenbiest kids while she visits her evil ex-baby daddy in the holding cell at the precinct where he’s the captain. Girl, we’ve all been there.

Monroe worries about overseeing this weird gene pool while Rosalee and Adalind have a quick little coffee klatch about Renard’s arrest. “You are so lucky Nick is your dad,” Rosalee tells Kelly of the chubby cheeks.

In the tunnels, Nick is jonesing to touch the stick again, but when he dives to pick it up, it clearly affects him in a way he doesn’t like, so he throws it back down again. Quit handling your stick, Nick.

At the precinct, Renard’s meeting with Adalind doesn’t go well. “You expect me to be your alibi for a murder you didn’t commit because you were actually murdering the person who was your alibi?”

“Basically, yeah. It shouldn’t be too hard,” he replies. Unsurprisingly, that’s a big nope from Adalind.

Back in the spice shop, Monroe summons Rosalee to the front, where a purple-eyed Diana is levitating a host of glass spice jars, magically obliterating one. “Do you like it?” she asks. I’m guessing the adults have both seen It’s a Good Life because they carefully perform the “it’s good that you did that” song and dance.

When Trubel and Eve arrive, Diana announces that Eve is different now. Then the women leave a frightened Monroe alone with Diana again. Poor guy!

While the women confer, Nick, Bud, Wu, and Hank meet in the tunnels. They agree that what Nick really needs is for Renard to drop the charges against him, so Nick calls Adalind to pick her brain. I love that they rely on each other for moral support-slash-brainstorming about magical tactics to crush their enemies. Adalind suggests a Trust Me Knot, in which both parties swear to complete a task and anyone who fails will die. He tells her to meet him where she first told him she loved him. Awww!

In order to accomplish the Trust Me Knot, Renard also needs to be present, so Hank and Wu arrive to transport him from his cell. Renard clearly considers the possibility that he’s being taken to an extra-judicial execution, despite assurances to the contrary.

The action shifts to Nick’s loft now and, in a shot that seems to be there just for the fun of it, Nick and his beautifully stubbled chin wash his hands in a sink with a razor sitting on the edge. Not today, razor. Not today.

Once Renard shows up, Nick outlines the plan for the Trust Me Knot: Renard will drop the charges and reinstate Nick in exchange for Adalind providing an alibi for Rachel’s murder. Renard points out that Adalind’s already turned him down.

“She didn’t turn me down,” Nick smugs. WOOF. That’s the most possessively masculine thing I’ve seen on TV in ages, and I need to watch it 50 more times. Then Renard makes it creepy when Adalind shows up, sniping, “You really get around, don’t you?”

Adalind hands Nick one end of a thick rope and Renard the other, explaining that anyone who breaks this blood oath will die. She woges and drips her Hexenblood on the rope, which turns red from end to end. She speaks some words, and the rope knots itself into a noose. Oooh, practical and decorative.

However, this seems like a crappy contract. Renard has no guarantee that the alibi will get him out of trouble, and Nick doesn’t have to do anything at all; it’s all down to Adalind’s actions. I dunno; if I’m entering into a blood oath death contract, I’d want something in writing, maybe something a little more comprehensive and broad. But my lawyer’s not Wesen, so what do I know?

In the spice shop, Rosalee, Eve, Trubel, and Adalind confer over different chemical approaches to examine the cloth and in so doing, pass the Bechdel test and reinforce the importance of STEAM education. They also remind us that last season, a spectral imaging machine showed the words “miracle” and “perilous” on the cloth. They want to see what else is on there, but one of the compounds Rosalee tries dissolves the section of the cloth it touches.

When Monroe and Diana come downstairs, Diana easily sees all the writing on the cloth — and it is covered. Lines and symbols spiral across it.

Nick, who apparently feels comfortable moving around the city now, joins the party. He thanks Diana for helping, and she tells him that she likes Kelly. That’s a relief.

Diana employs her impressive artistic ability to draw what she sees, but no one has any idea what they’re looking at. Like, how do you even begin to Google “weird symbols unbeknownst to modern or even ancient humanity?”

While this is happening, Trubel takes a call from Hadrian’s Wall, instructing the Grimms to prepare themselves for transport elsewhere. Nick refuses to leave, so Trubel reluctantly says goodbye and warns him to be alive when she gets back.

Then Hank gets a call that Renard’s grand jury is convening in two hours, so they tell Adalind to hustle there while Wu frets that the evidence is too strong, no matter what they do.

Doesn’t matter, though! Stancroft is the presiding judge, and as Hank, Wu, and Adalind look on, he rules there’s insufficient evidence to convene the grand jury. Renard is free to go. That’s … that’s not at all how grand juries work, but whatevs; Grimm is far from the first show not to use a legal consultant for situations like this, and it paves the way for the next complication: Renard says that since Adalind didn’t testify, the Trust Me Knot’s off, Nick’s out of luck, and Hank and Wu need to resign immediatamente.

See? See? What did I say? A more thoughtfully constructed, loophole-free contract for the Trust Me Knot could’ve prevented this!

Defeated, Nick asks Adalind to move back in with Renard to keep her and the children safe. “The bastard got everything he wanted,” Hank growls. And even though I know he’s the bad guy here, I still kind of love it when Renard wins. He’s such a great antagonist.

The man in question strides out of the courthouse and makes a phone call, demanding that Nick be found. He flashes a cocky smile, and the episode closes on him in a superhero pose on the courthouse steps.

Justice may not have been served, but our entertainment certainly has been.

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